30 Days to a Better Man – My Day 22 – Posture? Nah.

So today (lol not even close) was supposed to be about good posture. But this is my blog and I’ll write about whatever I want and I definitely don’t want to spend three hours of my life writing about posture. Just check out AoM‘s article about it instead if you’re really that interested. I, on the other hand, have zero interest in talking about that. Instead, I’m sure you’ve noticed the infinitely wide gap that seems to grow between posts. The short answer is that I lack commitment. Once I get bored of something, I’m done with it. I mean, the origin of this recent influx of posts was just me at midnight saying, “Screw it” and starting this whole thing up again while totally reimagining the layout. But sadly, I have come to realize that this blog is hard work and I don’t like forcing myself to do things. Oddly, I’ve ignored my natural instinct to end it all and I plan to continually post on here but on my own schedule. I like what I do on here, but I have a whole life outside of this computer that I’m also trying to focus on. This isn’t my what I want to spend a majority of my time on, but I have a lot of value in this. I don’t want to give it up so I won’t. This will instead be an exercise in self-control and commitment. The last two years have been about changing myself for the better and life has just given me a fantastic opportunity.

For as long as I can remember, I’ve struggled with commitment. I honestly don’t know why I struggle with it, but it is a problem. I start out very excited about something, but once the initial interest dies out so does my desire to continue doing it. Some examples, schools, games, books, this blog, karate, and tumbling. I feel so guilty every time it happens, but it’s like I can’t stop it. My options have come down to stop starting things, force your own commitment or deal with the guilt. None of these options seem very appealing but I don’t’ really have too many choices on this one. So I’m just going to have to stick with some things or find new ways to make it exciting again. I better get good at commitment or else my eventual marriage won’t do very well. So my current plan is to start small with something insignificant, like this blog, and get some practice in. No one may ever read this blog, but I’m going to keep posting in it until death do us part (or at least I’ll try). Wish me luck.

A little more committed,



Posture – http://www.qiwellnessblog.co.uk/bad-posture-5-signs-to-watch-out-for/

30 Days to a Better Man – My Day 21 – Inevitable Death

About three years ago, my sister and I were driving home from the mall. It was mid-December and we had just made the 45-minute trip out so we could finish our Christmas shopping. We were about half way home and I was talking to her about our coming exams and about Christmas while she drove. I remember we had left a movie in theChistmas Family PicDvd player in our car and I could barely hear Emporer Kuzco whining in the background. It was about 9 pm and the Christmas traffic was just subsiding enough that we could be going about 60 mph (96 kph). I was blabbering on when I realized it had started snowing. It was a light snow at first, but it suddenly turned thick. We were all the way in the right lane smooshed between the shoulder and a semi-truck. In front of us was a red pickup and behind us was another semi. Suddenly, the pickup began to slide. I remember peering above the dashboard and seeing the back end of the truck just barely missing the front of our car. He spun out onto the shoulder and my sister swerved into it as well before coming to a soft stop. We were catching our breath when I realized that if the truck had hit us, we would have come to screeching halt only to be decimated by the semi that was going 60 behind us. Out of a stroke of luck, my sister and I avoided serious injury or more likely, death.

The irony of this near-death experience is that I’m not really even supposed to be alive anyway. I was a science baby meaning I was born by insemination because my parents couldn’t get pregnant. The day I was born, I came out backward and got stuck. I almost suffocated and died. Two months later, I spent a week in the emergency room because my body refused to remain hydrated and they had to acclimate my body to water in some way. I don’t ask a lot of details on that one. It freaks me out pretty good.

It’s pretty prideful of me to think of myself as some sort of miracle baby, but I do it anyway. Anyway, I’ve been thinking about my own mortality a lot again today especially since today’s task was to write your own eulogy. This already cheerless activity just augments my sad and creepy mind. I’ve stated my love of everything horror many times on here and I just want use my knowledge to give an example of what I mean. My sister had a friend at our house about a year ago who is just one of the sweetest people to walk the earth. During her stay, I watched my favorite Final Destination movie (#2) because itFinal Destination has some of the raddest death scenes of any horror movie (in my humble opinion). This girl walked in and sat down and started watching the movie. She was pretty horrified by it. We began to talk about the premise of the film series a little and I brought up my favorite deaths. She exclaimed that it was quite horrid that I would ever have a “top deaths in a film” list. I wanted to explain myself, but I couldn’t even begin to describe my motives behind doing such a thing without sounding completely insane. I hadn’t thought there was anything wrong with having a list because it is so commonplace in the horror community. Just look up WatchMojo and you’ll find a playlist dedicated to just horror movie top tens and a good number of those have to do with the deaths. It wasn’t until I took actual time to think that it stopped making sense.

I said earlier that I often picture myself as some sort of miracle baby, but it’s a miracle that anyone survives on a day-to-day basis. Final Destination is a great reminder that ANYTHING can kill you. Just one mistake and you’re done. And you would have no idea you even set your death in motion until it happened. If I hadn’t boarded that plane, if I hadn’t eaten that burrito, if I had left the house one minute later. Life is full of what-ifs that could result in our untimely demise. But the really amazing thing is that we are still alive. I remember a gym teacher at a nearby school was just jogging across the gym when his heart just stopped beating and he fell over dead. The autopsy revealed nothing. No one knows what happened, but he died. You and I are still alive right now and that is something to truly celebrate. Out of everything in daily life that could end us, we are still here. I am personally very happy to be able to sit here and type out this post for no reason because I still can do it. The coolest thing may be that after all this morbid thought, I’m still going to live my life like normal. People are amazing because we recognize the danger that life regularly sends our way but we don’t let it stop us from being who we are. I love people. All in all, I may not have written my eulogy (I want an elegy anyway), but at least I feel like I’ve done some quality thinking today. Sorry for being so totally morbid.

A little more conscious of my mortality,



Grim Reaper – https://www.pinterest.com/pin/178173728977335222/

Goths – http://emgn.com/entertainment/16-weird-christmas-photos-even-confuse-santa/

Final Destination (I know it’s the poster for #1 and not #2 but it’s my blog and I’ll do what I want) – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Final_Destination_(film)

Burrito – https://giphy.com/search/everything-burrito

30 Days to a Better Man – Day 20 – I Humbly Serve

It’s going to be a short one today since I don’t want to sound like I love to brag. The goal was to find a way to serve other people. Not like as a butler, but as a do-gooder. Heres where it gets kinda braggy. I’ve been a part of a youth group for many years that is just stellar at volunteer work. When we return to volunteer spots, they purposefully assign us the hardest work because we are so fantastic at getting work done. We’re very proud of all the kids involved. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I have this day covered.

It has been immensily rewarding to be part of a group that has done some amazing work all over the country. It is extremely wise for anyone to search out an outlet for service work, especially in the community. I was just recently at a work day for a summer camp during which we helped landscape by the horse barn, the paintball course and cell tower. It was really hard work, but it felt great to see all the help we were able to provide for all the kids. It really does make me happy and it always feels like I grow closer with the people I work with. I’m making a hard suggestion to everyone that they find that outlet.

Feeling a little too prideful,


No nudes this time:

butler – https://github.com/h2non/butler

Sorry for the shorter post, but you can check out these other posts that could use some love (they are also my favorites): Junji Ito, Day 18 and Day 12

30 Days to a Better Man – Day 19 – I Adulted!

Can I just be honest and say being an adult is really lame? I spent my day making “exciting” phone calls to doctor offices. Today’s task was getting a physical, but the idea of having a physical where the doctor touches you makes me want to cry so I didn’t do that. Instead, I got some important stuff done. I’ve said a few times that I’m going to gone Image result for gif calling for helpover the summer so in preparation, I need to make sure my life doesn’t systematically fall apart during my absence. A couple of these were medical visits meaning the dentist and the eye doctor. My sister and I were told we needed to go to the dentist in March and it is now May so I decided it was time to get that done, so I immediately contacted my mom since I have no idea what I’m doing with my life. No, but really, I got the contact information off of her and spent my morning on the phone. I swear the universe is out to get me because I was just barely able to get my appointments figured out. It’s times like these that really awaken me to how dependent I am. It’s sad really.

Once I was done I realized that today’s post was going to be rather bland since I basically didn’t do what I was supposed to and I didn’t even read the article on AoM because I totally refuse the idea of a physical. So I obliged myself and read the article anyway. They make some fair points about the value of getting a physical. As I continued to read through the post I noticed a lot of the steps of a physical were pretty normal. Then I had a genius idea. I thought about it and came to the conclusion that I could put up withexercise someone I knew giving me a physical (except the getting naked part). My mom is a nurse so she could definitely do a physical. Although it wouldn’t be official, at least a medical professional has given me look. Sure enough, she was totally on board and she was proud of me for being bold enough to ask. Overall, it was uneventful. Apparently, I need to eat better and exercise more, but I already knew that. But if I cared about my health all that much then I would have gotten an actual physical with 100% nudity.

The real takeaway is that I put on my big boy pants and actually got some important stuff done. It’s another thing I don’t have to worry about this month so that’s good news. I just hope I can get some new glasses this time. It’s hard to wear glasses with only one arm still attached to the frames.

Someone who has come to realize Velma looking for her glasses is a little too real,


Some sweet, sweet links:

Adult- https://www.theodysseyonline.com/the-16-skills-you-need-in-order-to-win-at-adulting

Call – https://giphy.com/gifs/help-frog-puppet-gw3MYmhxEv8T52ow

Abs – https://www.pinterest.com/soupaircool/cultivating-my-stripper-body/

30 Days (or more) to a Better Man – Day 18? – Heyyo! I’m Back :)

I’m sure there was doubt, but I have defied the odds because I Am BACK!! It feels SO great to be back here typing away for my runty, but fantastic, audience. It was a rough week of exams and it won’t be the last one, but it’s over for now and we will move on. Follow my descent into silence by going here, then here and finally, go here. This bloginconsistent Jacksfilms has become as consistent as a YouTube channel that promises new videos every “blank”day (enjoy that vague youtuber joke and link). Sorry about that.

Anyway, it is time to get back to the “daily” series 30 days to a better man. “Today” is about finding your nuts. It’s harder than it sounds. Alright, innuendos aside, this was actually meant to be a thoughtful and deep day. N.U.T.s stands for Non-negotiable, Unalterable Terms. This is supposed to be the things in your life you are steadfastly out to hold onto. Mostly in the moral or ideal department. Some examples: I say what I want, I do as I see fit, I do not tolerate my wife’s attempts to belittle me and so on. I picked some of the more over-the-top options found on AoM, but this is meant to be serious. I have no idea why, but I have struggled beyond belief with this one. I’m not a very pushy person and I don’t enjoy being really set in my ways unless I’m really passionate about something like the undeniable quality of anime or the pronunciation of Redamak’s. NoneRedamaks the less, I struggled. The examples on the site (find them here) just seemed so generic or selfish. I wasn’t a fan and they weren’t getting my creative juices flowing (as nasty as it sounds). My scientific personality type is INFJ (click on it to learn about me because I’m apparently a rare breed) and it basically puts me as the lovable do-gooder. BettyWhich is about me to a T because I can’t even do the InFamous playthrough of THE GAME InFamous: Second Son. My conscience has eaten away at my mettle after betraying Betty and that’s only the first choice. I’m getting too wordy again.

I guess what I’m trying to get at is that I don’t know what my basic N.U.T.s are. When the situations that arise in my life to wield my NUTs then I’ll do it. The way AoM puts it is this: Relationships would be a lot simpler if the people involved were able to quickly and simply state their NUTs so there is no confusion or toe-stepping later on. I mean, fair enough. I’ve had friendships in which it would haven been Sooo beneficial if we had gotten something out in the open right away. But I don’t think people are that simple. I take a lot of pride in being able to see through the facades people put up. Just another interesting skills in the tool belt of an INFJ. I picked my career because I understand people and I like to make others happy. I don’t want to antagonize anyone over at AoM. I love their site and the content they put out and it’s brave to ask people to funnel down their motives into bite-size pieces. I even somewhat agree that some characteristics about people are obvious and can be plainly stated, but that seems to be a limit view on human personality. 90% of the fun of really getting to know someone is exploring them and discovering what makes them who they are. Actually, that’s 100% of the fun. You learn best by experience so experiencing people’s boundaries is the best way to get closer to them. If they really care about knowing YOU, then they’ll figure out your NUTs by themselves.

Again, I don’t want to downgrade AoM too much. Knowing what makes you specifically you is also important. So there is value behind hunting down a couple NUTs. A personal example could be that I’m a Christian. It’s an important aspect of who I am, but it isn’t something you would get immediately when meeting me. Now, I’m not saying you should Cashiershove these traits down random people’s throats. I don’t go to the supermarket and tell the cashier I’m a Christian while she rings up my frozen pizza. But if I’m at a party and the conversation goes somewhere I don’t feel comfortable, then I can already be prepared to pull myself out of the situation. I have an understanding of my own boundaries and the basic components of myself. This is where I personally find the value of knowing a few of your NUTs.

Overall, “today’s” task was pretty entertaining. I got to run through my house yelling “I can’t find my nuts!” so there is always that. I’m honestly just so excited to be back and I really hope this latest installment in this series was at least mildly entertaining. I mostly just hope I’ve helped someone waste time at work.

I’ll be Back,


And now for what you really came for (links, it’s links):

Austin – https://memegenerator.net/instance/39943788

Jacksfilms – https://maddiegudenkauf.wordpress.com/tag/jacksfilms/

Redamaks – http://aht.seriouseats.com/archives/2011/08/redamaks-burger-review-new-buffalo-mi.html

Betty – http://www.game-over.com/content/2014/03/infamous-second-son/#sthash.OF9g2vjL.dpbs

Cashier – http://m.inmagine.com/image-is098v384-Female-cashier-and-customer-at-supermarket-checkout.html

Terminator – https://giphy.com/search/terminator

Warning: Adult Decisions were Made

I’ve recently posted about the lateness of the other posts on this blog and now I’m going to do it again. To ensure the quality of the work I do whether it be on here, in school or at my job, I’ve decided to take a short break from this blog until I have more time. I may do some intermittent posts during the coming week, but it won’t be every day as usual. This break will only take about a week until exams are done. I just can’t sustain all of this at one time. I truly am very sorry, but remember: I’ll be back.

More than a little sad to say this,


Goosebumps: The Fear was Real

I previously mentioned in another post that my first chapter book was Goosebumps: The Haunted School. I got it in a package from my aunt who was getting rid of her sons’ old haunted schoolkid stuff and she thought I would like to have their Goosebumps books. My mom handed me the box after dinner one night and I was overjoyed at the opportunity. I crawled onto my dad’s lap and I spent the next four hours bingeing the first book I pulled out of the box. This was a couple beginnings for me. This was the beginning of my real love to read and of my love for the horror genre. This series holds a lot of value for me personally.

After that day, I continued to receive boxes of books every few months from my aunt (I don’t think she realized I finished each box in a week). Until they eventually stopped andhaunted mask I didn’t have the whole collection. So I scoured the Borders every once in a while in hopes of finding the copies I didn’t have yet. I also started to collect the tv series. It was like a personal vendetta, I had to have ’em all. I used to think both the books and the show were horrifying! I had a system in place for when I finished a book and how to deal with the fear that would overtake me. They were that scary to me.

There was a time when I was at a campground with my family and my cousins. The adults were having a fire so they sent inside to watch movies. I was surprised to find a VHS tape of a Goosebumps episode (it was Stay Out of the Basement). I was really excited to see it and I pushed my cousin and my sister to watch it. We got through about half of it when a loud CRACK echoed across the area. I’m man enough to admit that we all screamed. But shortly after, I realized I couldn’t hear my aunt asleep down the hall anymore. I pointed it out to the others and my cousin was worried so he stay out of the basementpushed us to go check on her. I went for the light switch, but he grabbed my arm. He said he didn’t want to wake her up just in case because she gets really angry when you wake her up. So we continued into the dark until we reached her bed, but we couldn’t tell if she was there. My sister suggested reaching out and trying to lightly test if she was there. I was unanimously “volunteered” for this mission. I slowly reached out my hand and felt around. I came back with empty sheets. We hadn’t seen or heard her leave so we had no idea where she had gone? Needless to say, we were terrified and we bolted back to the light of the tv that was now displaying the end of the show. I was too scared so it was time to get my mom, so I practically threw myself out of the dark camper into an empty circle of chairs. We were awestruck. Everyone was gone out here too! I decided to make a break for it. Whatever was taking people wasn’t going to get me. I ran as fast as I could toward the playground (the unlit playground) and straight into a person. Horrified, I looked up to find out what it was. I was confused to find my dad. He explained that anhorrorland erratic driver had blown through the playground in his truck and smashed the gate at the exit and the adults had gone to see what had happened. My aunt had been woken up by the noise and left through the back exit in the camper which I didn’t know about. I was a little kid at the time and I had a pretty good imagination (I think I still have a quality imagination for an adult) after watching a Goosebumps episode, our minds had made up an entire horror scenario to explain what had happened. It wasn’t anything particularly scary and we never would have assumed there was anything nefarious involved, but it was all fueled by a scary show.

I can look back at that moment and laugh because it was the goofy inner working of a child’s imagination, but at the time it felt like the only logical conclusion. I can also look living dummyback to that show and the books and recognize how cheesy they are. The acting, the stories, the scenarios, the jumpscares. It all seems so silly now. I’ve stated a couple times before that I’m a horror fan and my taste in film and literature has shaped my delight in the macabre. I consider myself skilled in recognizing effective horror even if I don’t get scared anymore. These books are of a higher quality for sure than their tv counterparts. They’re a cultural phenomenon. Horror stories for kids. It’s awesome. I have a strong respect for what the series has accomplished, especially with the number of copies sold (about 350 million sold in 2014!). R.L. Stine even put my name into a book as a lead character’s friend because I emailed him on my birthday and asked him to do it as a birthday present. This series has woven itself into the very fabric of my life. I literally cannot bring up this book when talking about the origin of some of my strongest interests. So today I dedicated a post entirely to this amazing series. Thank you, R.L. Stine.

A little bit sure that truck driver was mad drunk,


the pictures:

haunted school – http://goosebumps.wikia.com/wiki/The_Haunted_School

haunted mask – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Haunted_Mask

basement – http://goosebumps.wikia.com/wiki/Stay_Out_of_the_Basement

horrorland – http://goosebumps.wikia.com/wiki/One_Day_at_HorrorLand

living dummy – http://goosebumps.wikia.com/wiki/Night_of_the_Living_Dummy